There are very few crucibles available for people to explore themselves at the deepest level. Relationship is one of them.
Does any of this sound familiar?
You enter into your romantic experiences with the best intentions to “get it right this time” only to experience the same issues you had in the last one.
You wish you could be 100% transparent and honest about what's important to you in dating and relationships struggle to let partners know where your boundaries are and what you need and want in your romantic life.
You want to bring a sense of open-mindedness, balance and empathy to dating and relationships but too often find yourself in a power struggle tug-of-war feeling unseen, unheard and unsupported.
You wish there was more joy, laughter and play in your love life but it feels like things are always so serious.
You want greater emotional and physical intimacy in your romantic relationships but have no idea how to do that or where to start.
If you did an internal or visible nod to any of these you're in the right place and I'm so glad you're here.
In fact, here at Women Can Heal you're in very good company! Each of us learns about love and relationships when we’re young by taking cues and lessons from our caregivers and carry these teachings forward into our adult relationships. We tend to believe we are looking for happiness and fulfillment" but what we are really searching for is familiarity. We're looking to recreate in our adult relationships the feelings and behaviors we knew growing up.
What's unfortunate is that so many of us didn't experience continuous tenderness, care and respect growing up or learn key behaviors that facilitate healthy relationships.
As we grow up we're also conditioned by music, movies and television to believe a fantasy about what relationships truly are and search for that perfect relationship through this very lens. It's unrealistic though because there is no such thing as the perfect relationship. And this is the where so many of us struggle and where so many partnerships fail. We want the familiarity of our upbringing which in many causes was painful AND the fantasy we've been seeing on TV! Can you see how we've been set up to fumble in the dark when it comes to relationships?
If you’re struggling in your love life despite your best attempts, I want to normalize all of this for you right here right now.
Hi! I'm Michele and this is my partner Julian.
We've been together for over four years and we were totally fumbling in the dark for the first few years of our relationship.