I worked for a sales company for two and half years and during that time I got some intensive sales training. I attended monthly and weekly sales trainings. I memorized countless scrips. I role played with my colleagues. I shadowed the top sales people there. I had a ton of sales books on Audible I was listening to before bed. I was even head of sales for an affiliate city for a couple months before everyone realized I couldn’t sell for shit and I was moved to a different position working in customer service.
Before I stepped into my non-sales role at the company, I had a lot of shame about not being able to sell. I both wanted to be a successful sales woman and battled with avoiding and distracting myself from the sales process all together. I didn’t understand what I was doing. The avoidance and force myself through the resistance back and forth became exhausting.
I got a slight break from all the mental and emotional shame and self-doubt storm around selling working in customer service. But it came back with a fury after I left the company and started exploring my desire to start a business of my own…selling my own services and products.
It was so painful.
I had to get self-aware about what was happening for me. This time I didn’t have any excuses. I couldn’t blame it on what I was selling. I couldn’t blame it on not having enough training. I couldn’t blame it on being tired or stressed out. But the same things were happening. The avoidance of the sales process and forcing myself through it cycle. Something that was different was that I was taking "no" to my offers much, MUCH harder than before.
I remember doing an exploratory session for coaching with a woman and at the end she said "no" to my offer for coaching and I didn’t do another exploratory for 6 months even though the desire to coach was stronger than ever.
So it was bad.
I wanted to know what was happening and thankfully at this time in my self-development journey I had some tools.
I started with exploring my resistance using my tools and I found fear beneath it. Ok, this wasn't a surprise.
Fear of rejection. Fear of asking for money. Fear of past bad sales experiences I had had.
The one that surprised me the most was the fear of being a fraud and a liar.
Hm. I wondered about this. How could I be a fraud and liar? It wasn’t like I was selling broken vacuums to unsuspecting people.
With more inquiry I learned that this fear came from a deep belief that I didn’t believe I had value to offer people and so asking for money in exchange for my service (that I believed had no value) was defrauding people.
So now I felt like I had something meaty to work with and since uncovering that link I’ve been actively working on my self-worth and self-esteem since diving deeper into entrepreneurship.
It’s been confronting, uncomfortable and rewarding aligning self-worth and sales practice.
I think I always knew that self-worth was connected to everything but I’ve been having to relearn just how important this is.
It's a core for me and it’s work I have to (want to) do every day.
Sometimes intentionally by setting aside an hour to do mindset healing work.
Sometimes spontaneous by moving faster than fear and talking about what I do with a woman in a shared lyft. Sometimes deep and tearful by journaling the cost of not loving myself unconditionally. Sometimes joyful and freeing by dancing to Beyoncé’s “Formation” in the mirror.
All of it is transforming the pain of low self-worth into power to fuel my business and my entire life.
The work of healing my mindset has finally allowed me (one week before doors close for my first group program!) to post about it openly on facebook.
Enrolling for this course has been magically healing. I gave myself the perfect container to practice what I've been learning!
So no, you buying this course will not increase my self-worth. You not buying this course will not decrease my self-worth.
This is the work and I love myself for doing it now rather than shaming myself for waiting until now.
TRANSFORM is a 6-week alchemical experience for just 6 women that is designed to illuminate the root causes of your ongoing stressors and teach you how to free yourself from the mental, emotional and spiritual blocks that have been holding you back from the extraordinary life you are meant to live.
TRANSFORM is for: • Single women who want a longterm intimate partner • Partnered women who want to upgrade their relationship • Ambitious women who want to actualize their potential • Courageous women who want an emotional breakthrough • Empathic women who want to transform their pain to power
TRANSFORM includes: 6 virtual group calls, 3 one-on-one sessions (in-person if SF-based), inspiring lecture, stimulating dialogue, and experiential exercises/homework.
There are 2 spots left and we begin Sunday July 14th at 11AM PST.
• Love yourself unconditionally and know your worth • Free yourself from limiting thought patterns and dynamics in your relationships • Let go of grudges, forgive yourself and others • Thrive in your career, business endeavors and passions • Know your boundaries and make empowered choices for your health and happiness • Discover what you really want in all areas of your life and... go after it! • Tap into a pool of love and sisterhood
Love, Michele Founder of Women Can Heal